Echoes and Moments

Don't  Surrender  Your loneliness so quickly,  Let it cut more  Deep.  Let it ferment and season you  As few human  Or even divine ingredients can.  Something missing in my heart tonight  Has made my eyes so soft,  My voice so  Tender,  My need of God  Absolutely  Clear. -Sufi Master Hafiz

My Heart Breaks for you, Daughter of long sunsets I let so many of you down, Tears falling from eyes that I failed to tell Were so precious in sight not mine My heart Yearns for truth And lips with speech unleashed Passion to captivate a kindred near Our sight restored to horizons wide Unfailing in its courageous breadth My heart Streaked with spilled blood Poured out from crosses carried daily And lifted from night unto night Whispering words from the wounds I failed to let Love carry My heart Loves to love Heals each time you call And breaks each time we fall Bears new scars from ages gone by And dreams for a dawn's golden sky

This past week I turned 25. My distance from the joyous days of college can create some dissonance in me, especially given the fractured nature of community, the difficulty of finding new friends post college, and the tension I live in as a resident in a new city. Yet I find it helpful to reflect upon a few things that make simply being alive beautiful and worthwhile. I recently moved to the city of Fresno to pursue new ministry opportunities serving the students at Fresno City College, a large urban commuter campus with a demographic makeup as diverse and beautiful as the city it draws its student population from. The student community I've found is incredibly loving, supportive, and even helped provide transportation when my beloved pickup Guillermo was in the shop for repairs. Additionally, they are for the most part committed to the apostolic vision of InterVarsity, which means we seek God's transformation of students, faculty, and the campus. Although campus ministry...

I awoke with fires in my head; They fanned out with a quickening spark, That inspiration found in the quiet nights And lonely highways where my mind Wandered, and we held onto fading thoughts. No, they were not the kind to shake me gently Or care to dance me into day's light Rather, thoughts burned screaming To be released and washed into an ocean Of noise that the world already had room for. Why does this dream haunt me so? Is there a return yield on investment That I was unaware I sowed into, Long prayers uttered in the darkest hours And awakening ancient rhythms to my lips? A party, some say at times: Others, simply voices Making the mind bend to allow for things That only seeded fear would shake That someday will collapse into canyons of memory. One voice rests quietly within Stillness seeping down into the cracks Where the fires once blazed violently The balm to soothe this weary mind-- The voice gives life where life once left. Yes, it is the fli...

Many people in my generation  were introduced to pop philosophy through the words of the cloaked future warrior Morpheus, played with concise elegance by one Laurence Fishburne in The Matrix trilogy. Although some dismiss the movies for their shoddy treatment of philosophical and religious themes, I've always been a fan for the pure amount of adrenaline that the series creates as Morpheus guides the hacker turned hero Neo to claim his identity as 'the one.' The series pits humanity against a race of machines that desires nothing but control through a programmed dream world. Neo awakens from this dream to a nightmarish reality where humans "are no longer born, but grown" in vast fields of embryonic chambers. He is trained so that he can face the deadliest of these computer programs, called "agents" and then proceeds to lead us in a series of increasingly impressive action sequences where his skills are honed and we are generally reminded that the purpose ...

Today marks the last full day I'll spend as a resident of the city of Roseville. Tomorrow I embark on the great adventure towards which I've striven these past six months: the move to the inner city of Fresno to minister to college students there. While I never expected to live here as long as I did, there are a few things that I've learned to love about this place, even though it represents a great contrast from the place that I'm called to live in for this next season of life. It's important to me not to reject the life I've found here, for I need to be conscious of all God's children, rich or poor. 5. The Variety of Food Roseville is a large suburban center, designed both as a hub for tech business (Hewlett-Packard has a large plant here) and as a center of major shopping outlets. The entire north-central part of the city is outlined in a Specific Plan (to use the urban planning jargon that I was trained in) that guides development around a ma...

Good art shows, it doesn't tell. Therefore 'Worship Arts' may appear paradoxical at first glance, though it increasingly forms the job description for many new pastoral church staff. For a few years the title 'Worship Coordinator' formed my ministry identity as a member of youth group and later in college. So you may understand my ambivalence when I attempt to explain my practical theology of worship, which has more to do with David crying in a cave than it does with light shows, good guitar tone, and reverb-washed vocals. Let me explain. For many years the contemporary church has been embroiled in something asininely referred to as the "worship wars." Relevant Magazine has a helpful summary of the phenomena for the post-evangelical age, which I won't treat in depth here. See, I led worship for two years in a multiethnic fellowship of college students committed to seeing Jesus transform the lives of students and faculty in a profound and rea...